I can feel two things at once:

Grateful for how you held me close,

Infuriated for how you pushed me away;

Joyful for the time we shared together,

Devastated for how those times have ended;

Empathy for what you must be going through,

Wounded by the wedge you drove between us;

Hopeful to be made whole again,

Hopeless that it will ever be made right.

I can feel everything at once:

Exhausted, numb, anxious, wrathful, vengeful,

Scalded, confused, curious, encased in dread.

Whirling in a storm of feelings

That seems to never cease

Because there is no closure on the door

That keeps them all at bay.

I can feel two things are once:

Longing to embrace you,

Revulsion in your presence;

Wishing earnestly for restoration,

Wishing I could walk away;

Desire to continue existing

Desire to simply disappear.

I can feel two things at once.